Day 304

Confession: This morning I bought a desk second hand. This afternoon I created my office space. This evening I cried.

It took me a while to process why every time I looked at my new corner I felt relief, discomfort, excitement and unfamiliarity.

I’m 30 and I’ve never had a private, proper work space at my own desk before.

And I’m scared to get comfortable—into a rhythm—because I’m only familiar with Temporary. Which is a problematic thing to be acquainted with so closely. I never relax. Never trust. Never start.

It’s a form of holding my breath.

But I chose this desk because it’s small and I can carry it on my own. I can take it anywhere. Life can change but my island doesn’t need to.

I cried because I didn’t know how badly I needed this.

-Written from the desk

Sound of the day: Charlie Grey & Joseph Peach – Gathan-grèin https://youtu.be/zkc3zfzK73A?si=PINHswDP1l5VPV9f