Confession: I decided to wait all year to share this one. Put it at the top, who cares.
A buddy reached out to me last minute to come downtown to see HEALTH—a band we’d seen together once before, and a band I first came across as an opener, before that. (They’re not my favourite band, and I couldn’t name their songs, but there’s something addictive about their live performances.)
I’d never taken the skytrain alone but decided to pull myself up by the bootstraps and skedaddle. Everything went well getting there and inside the venue, aside from the bouncer confiscating a knife I forgot in my bag. (They held it for me all night, but later that year someone lost it).
The show was great and the skytrain ride home started off okay. But then I started to not feel so well; nauseous, sweating…I wasn’t drunk and I hadn’t eaten anything so I didn’t understand—
Oh.
Oh no.
The skytrain came to a delayed halt and I realized I needed a toilet.
It was a long ride and no Stop had an open facility. By the time I got to my truck in the station parking lot, I was out of time.
I scanned the bushes. They were all lit up by street lights. I looked in the distance at the faint glow of a McDonalds sign. I wouldn’t make it.
As an adult, I’ve never pooped my pants and I wasn’t about to start.
I got into my truck and fished out a doggy bag, napkins, and hand sanitizer.
I got in the back seat and did what I had to do and if I’m honest, it was actually a pleasant experience given the circumstances.
Aside from the fact I had to drive home with the baggy to discard of it.
But that’s rock n roll, baby.
Sound of the day: HEALTH – STONEFIST https://youtu.be/G1qvEr9bC6c?si=OR7szgebQjHnxJvv
This past week I came across a satirical meme and felt the timing was…timed.
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